Masih ada yang peduli

Hari ini jadual seperti biasa di Rumah Sakit Umum Pusat Nasional Dr. Cipto Mangunkusumo (okay, cuba sebut laju-laju muahaha!). Dari pukul 9-12pm, pergi Poli Umum Anak. Pasien pertama masuk. Seorang anak laki-laki berusia 8 tahun. Baju compang camping dan kotor. Dari segi luaran, nampak anak ni tak terurus. Tapi bila tengok orang yang bawa dia ke Poli, smart habis cam nak pegi kantor (pejabat).

Bila dah start anamnesis, ternyata orang yang bawa anak malang ini ialah orang yang lalu lalang di tepi jalan. 2 minggu yang lalu, anak tersebut telah terlindas mobil di kaki kirinya (kaki kiri kena gilis kereta). Dibawa ke rumah sakit yang namanya dirahsiakan dan di situ, dia hanya menerima perawatan luka SAHAJA. Okay, what in the world were they thinking?? (oh, terEnglish la pulokkk hahaha). Maksud saya, dari history-taking je dah tau anak ni kaki dia tergilis kereta. What do you expect? Takde pulak nak suspect fracture? Maybe they didn't even do any physical examination on this poor kid. Range of motion sangat terbatas. Dorsoflexion extension, eversion dan inversion tidak dapat dilakukan. Tapi mungkin orang yang langgar anak ini hanya nak cover expenses for basic treatment je. Yelah, radiology mahal dan tiada siapa nak tanggung. But supposedly, the culprit that ran over him should be the one to blame. He should have covered all the medical expenses needed.

Setelah menerima perawatan, anak ni pulang ke rumah seperti biasa. Turns out that both of his parents died a few years ago. Meninggal sebab Tuberculosis dan HIV. Sekarang tinggal bersama nenek dan dua orang adiknya. Adik kedua, takde cerita. Adik ketiga, dah kena HIV. Yang abangnya ni pulak, ada Tuberculosis paru. But the doctor decided not to give any treatment due to low compliance which the child will later on develop resistant TB.

Part yang paling sedih bila nenek anak ini cam buat endah tak endah. Luka di kaki masih belum sembuh dan sudah ada secondary infection. Bila disuruh cucunya jangan mengamen (minta derma di jalanan) sebelum kakinya sembuh, dia siap boleh cakap "Habis, kalau ga ngamen, emang saya mau makan apa?". Dammit nenek. Can't you see this poor child suffering?? He couldn't even walk properly for God's sake! Dari gaya percakapan, ternyata nenek ni hanya ingin dengan dunianya sendiri. She looks properly dressed tapi cucu-cucunya.... (fill in the blank yourself)

Saya sungguh terharu dengan wanita muda berbaju merah tadi. She was just an outsider (not a social worker, mind you!) who happened to meet the child by the roadside, limping. Waktu cuci luka tadi, walaupun sakit, anak tersebut tidak sedikit pun menangis. He was strong. Wanita tadi siap memeluk anak tersebut supaya menahan kesakitan. Sekali tengok, serious, rasa macam wanita tersebut menganggap itu anaknya. She hopes to get the child a foster home and has everything in planning. Sebelum ini, memang gadis inilah yang mengambil berat tentang apa yang berlaku kat anak ini dan adik-adiknya. I was amazed, mesmerized by the kindness shown. She's young and so pure at heart.

This reminds me to show more empathy to every patient that comes to see me. Tak kisahlah taraf ekonomi dia tapi even words could make a person happier. Lepas ni, kalau tengok ada anak yang mengamen, for sure akan ingat kat anak ni. :') To that unknown lady, thanks for the life lesson. I promise that I would be a good doctor one day. ^___^


Ps. Mannnn.. I should have written everything in English. So messed up!

Change

I wish I were as happy-go-lucky as she is. She's so carefree and cheerful even though she may look manic sometimes. I wish I were like that. For the past few months, I've been emotional. Always. Not sure if that's the type of person I really am but I wanna change for a better me. I got easily irritated/annoyed with the simplest thing. I seriously need to stop!

Be happy. Don't think too much unnecessarily. Life goes on, right? ;)

Jump for your life!

Climax

Keluh kesah di Facebook saya.

Laughing at other people's mistake doesn't make you any smarter. In fact, it's the other way around. Period.

Honestly, what did I do wrong? (╥﹏╥) I got hurt and was merely pointing out my opinion and then I got hurt again. If you're gonna continue being cold with me, then be it. I've nothing else to say.

 Saya tatau sejak bila saya jadi gangster, sejak bila saya jadi pemarah, sejak bila saya dah pandai bergaduh dengan budak lelaki. Yes, you heard me right. Cakap pun jarang, apatah lagi takde angin, takde pape nak gaduh pulak kan. Tapi saya gaduh pakai silent treatment, secara pasif je. Takde kot nak bertekak mulut sebab sudah pasti berguguran air mata muahaha~

Dia suruh saya check perangai saya sendiri sebelum nak mengata orang sebab nobody's perfect. Saya tak mengata okay. Uhhhh~ Benci. I know it's a DARN TRUE FACT that nobody's perfect. I don't need to be reminded especially by someone like you. The thing that you did, that horrible thing? Yes, I know everything. So, if you don't like me, fine! I don't like you either. Let's just ignore each others existence, shall we? Hearing your voice annoys the crap outta me.

Ya, ini entri emo. Sekian.

Ps. Saya sangat busy nowadays. Sempat blogwalking sekejap je. T___T

Back in Jakarta

I was in Tangerang for the past week. God knows how hulu that place is. No internet connection and the most important thing I'd like to highlight, no bloody cabs passing by. I waited for almost 3 hours! Please please I don't want to be sent there back again for my next posting. I swear, I had such an excruciating life there. The hospital itself wasn't that bad. It was my hostel life which pretty sucked. Oh do tell me if you think that I sorta have hearing problem. I got so used to hearing loud voices and laughter. It was unbearable.

T____________T

Ps. To be safe, make sure you have the right people by your side or else you're gonna suffer to the extend of... oh only God knows.

I iz bz

Me in my oncall uniform for Paeds posting! ^__^

Yes, I haven't been updating you see. Paediatrics posting is starting to get hectic. Had my first night shift yesterday from 3.30pm till 6am the next day. The schedule for the next day started exactly at 7am with a morning report in which those who were on night shifts had to present one of the cases during their oncall. The day usually ended at 3pm and so the vicious cycyle starts all over again and again.

Mannn.. I didn't even sleep a wink last night. There were 6 old patients, 3 new patients. One case was brought to the resuscitation unit as a precaution measurement. She came with a sudden severe dyspnea and was diagnosed with heart failure ec chronic rheumatic heart disease with severe mitral regurgitation. Thrill was clearly seen and the murmur was loudly hurt. It was of grade 6, I think.. Since they were no medical students cuurrently posted at the Anesthesiology department, I had to monitor the patient cautiously throughout the night. Thank God she did not have to be resuscitated. :')

And so I went back to the hostel and slept till 7pm. (╥﹏╥) I need to get used to this since I'm gonna live like this for at least the next 30 years. O.o


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What the eff~

Ada siapa-siapa nak ke toilet, singgah la kat depan bilik hostel saya ye. Hahaha.. Baik punya toilet okay. Portable dowh.

Ps. Tiles toilet kena bongkah lagi sebab bocor ke bilik bawah. Damn. When will this ever end? (╥﹏╥)

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Azam raya

Memang saya akui, raya tahun ini adalah yang paling hambar. Tapi raya kali ini jugalah telah mengajar saya untuk menjadi seseorang yang lebih dewasa dan matang bukan saja dari segi fizikal (eh? ada kaitan ke) tetapi juga dari segi rohani, sosial, mental bla bla~Well, you get the point. Tak perlulah saya cerita sedetail-detailnya (pergh, penyalahgunaan bahasa!). Cukuplah saya seorang je yang tahu.

Yang penting, saya sudah berazam dengan sesorang yang saya sangat sayang untuk menjadi lebih baik. Nobody's perfect. Memang, semua pun nak bagitau kat saya tapi I don't need anyone to tell me that. Sometimes, imperfections make us perfect. Tapi janganlah melampau sangat pulak kan. Saya memang tersangatlah banyak flaws. Physically (okay, tu memang obvious)dan juga dari aspek attitude dan personality. I know sometimes I'm all that (emotional, egoistic, and selfish) but trust me, I've never meant to hurt anyone's feelings. Kadang-kadang, kita buat sesuatu yang salah tanpa kita sedari atau kita sedar tapi kita pura-pura tak ambil tahu. Paham tak?

I would never want to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. Saya tahu kesabaran memang ada batasnya juga. Manusia, mereka belajar dari kesilapan. Kesilapan menjadi bahan untuk mematangkan diri ini. Sometimes, I think I need to get a real hard slap in the face. A wake up call. Like, seriously!

Apa yang terjadi, biarlah. Buang yang keruh ambil yang jernih. Whatever in the past is over. Mari kita buka buku baru dan biarkan ia dihiasi dengan detik-detik indah. I promise you to become a better me. InsyaAllah. :)

Bondi beach, Sydney.

Met lebaran 1432H!

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri semua.

Maaf Zahir Batin :)

Saya tak balik Malaysia untuk raya pun. Ini hanyalah rekaan semata-mata. Pre-raya photoshoot. T___T Banyak dapat duit raya?